Tuesday, April 12, 2005

I Am Jack's Normal Day....

What I posted earlier seemed somehow incomplete, just to let you know that I still remember what I was up last night doing until about 7 AM, I have looked over the last post, which would have been the one where I talked about the assigned names. Just so I don’t end up looking like some kind of asshole for making fun of someone’s weight problem I would like to proclaim that the person know as “The Hutt” will have their name changed to Janus, that’s right, it’s the two faced Greek God, oh fuck, I am poetic.

I had a pretty good day; it started off with me getting a shortage of sleep, which I will make up for in a few short minutes here. I think that the most fun part of the day was going to the UC and just seeing everyone I know, even Janus and Shinji showed up and despite the fact that they were there, they didn’t bother me that much. I think that for the most part what bother’s me is the fact that they come around and act like they are completely oblivious to the rest of us.

I really only went to dinner to see Auska, thinking that I would be able to sit and talk with her about how she was doing, since she does that with me so often. I went down there thinking that this would be my chance to catch up with Auska. I don’t get many chances like that.

But when she showed up, Rei was with her, I didn’t expect her to be there too, when I had gone down to the bookstore I had only seen Auska working. I thought that on some off chance she had just taken the day off. I see a lot less of Rei than I used to, and I miss hanging out with her, I miss hanging out with Auska. It seems that I hang out with Darius and the Minstrel more and more these days.

It feels good to be surrounded with friends sometimes, but it also feels good to just know that you can sit with someone one on one and just talk to them. It feels liberating to learn new things about people, to see different sides of them. And while I feel that I have seen far too many sides of Janus, I could stand to see many more of some people around here.

Dinner was fun, pleasant and I felt fulfilled by what was going on. It was so funny how we were sitting at the table, I had been there since five, and it was about six thirty when this happened, but Rei and Auska started telling me I should eat something and that I never eat enough. One good thing is that I went with Darius earlier, because if not I wouldn’t have been able to eat.

That’s just the thing; I can’t tell Rei that she makes me nervous still, even now with the whole just friends thing. I’m just so nervous that I’ll fuck up when I’m around her, that I’ll mess something up. I can’t eat when I’m nervous, and yes I still eat because she’s hardly at dinner with me and you don’t get to look like I look by not eating. I assure everyone who reads this blog that I more than take care of myself in the food department.

That’s one thing that there is no need to worry about me over, is me eating my food. I will take care of it, even if I don’t eat at the table I will go back home and eat something. The other day at the Carabbas I didn’t eat because I didn’t have money and I didn’t want to spend Auska’s. I already owe so much to her, she has been really nice to me and I don’t think that I could show her how much I really care.

There was another interesting development today, I sat and ate with someone that I have yet to mention in the blog yet, lets just call her Target. I sat and talked with Target and asked her about what Janus said about her, the information I had was that Target was so mad at Darius and I for not liking Cait Sith.

Target told us that she didn’t say anything of the sort and now we know just one more thing that Janus has lied about. She’s two faced, she’s only out to cover her own ass. And I know someday that she’ll be exposed for it.

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