More Nice Things

Cardboard Tube Knight+
Justin is cherry pie. Sweet, one of a kind, and I like it a lot.

A nice comment written about my by someone very special.

There’s Something Wrong

So I caught a glimpse of the Tyra Banks show today and they were talking to a girl who was 14 and having sex and she was talking about sneaking around and how the guys are leaving her right after. One of them was a best friend of hers and the others were just random guys and everything I am seeing here is kind of jarring because I know that fourteen year olds are having sex.

But the fact that they’re behaving in a way that’s usually reserved for adults, like the leaving and looking for feelings in boys and all of that. It just seems really soon, probably because it is and its frankly kind of scary. How do the boys learn to leave the girls like that and screw their friends over for sex at 14?

What’s more is that people out there think this is normal and shouldn’t happen and see nothing wrong with it.

Leap?

Is it ever okay to leap with out looking?

On Writing

I am learning now that you can sometimes just have a little stroke of something that I don’t want to call luck or faith, but it seems to be something you’re meant to do.

For instance, I am having issues writing and I open a book to find this:

…stopping a piece of work just because it’s hard, either emotionally or imaginatively, is a bad idea. Sometimes you have to go on when you don’t feel like it, and sometimes you’re doing good work when it feels like all you’re managing is to shovel shit from a sitting position.

True Meaning

I think that today, I learned the true meaning of love.

A Thousand Words

Try

When is trying too much to ask and when do you not have to try at all? The truth of the matter is that trying and wanting and working your hardest isn’t always going to get you anywhere. It’s not as if the world measures the amount of work you put into something and gives that back, people don’t even do that. You can do all you can for someone and its not like they will feel obligated to notice or give back as much.

That’s the nature of the world and its sad, but its true.

So how do we know where to really work and try at something? And when do we give up?

On a side note, I got Tumblr and I was going to make it a mirror of this site but I think I would rather keep it separated.

Old Time Wisdom

“It does not matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop. “

Confucius said this, I think that somehow it holds a lot of meaning where I am right now.

Destiny

There’s a number of ways you can become who you’re wanting to be, it seems that they’re all harder to do than one would think. This is why I don’t believe in destinies…one can’t be destined for nothingness. You can’t be put on the Earth to be Homeless, you’re not dropped here to be a murderer. Things just happened and people just are. That’s a simple as it can get.

I had a dream that things hadn’t changed, that life was the way I felt like it should be. Not perfect, but definitely better.

Even if I can change some of the small things, move away, start over, be who I was…I can’t take back the things that ended, the people that are gone for good, the unkind words that cause schisms. Those are burned and etched in and they don’t wash clean, though they might fade with time.

At the same time I look at relationships that were never right, chances I know I want to take but never will and things that I feel like I have no control over though others might beg to differ. Sometimes I want to think that we pretty much fend for ourselves. But I remember a time when this blog helped me to save a girls life and the fact that she’s still out there because of what some would call dumb luck, might mean we’re not put here to do something meaningful all of the time, but at times we’re allowed to.

My Party

A while back, as a joke Brandon and I were talking about what Dungeons and Dragons classes each of our friends would be. It’s pretty easy to do since all you really need is a basis of a person’s personality and the imagination to take their quirks and behaviors to the most extreme place. The joke never really got past a few laughs, but I kind of always wanted to make a little list of some I had in my head before. I’ve tried not to repeat any classes, but there’s only so many viable ones.

1. Brandon – Cleric: I think my reasoning behind this one is pretty obvious.
2. Rickey – Monk: If anyone was ever deadly with his hands, its Rickey.
3. P.J. – Sorcerer: He seems to be able to easily dazzle the Hell out of people and its probably all Charisma based.
4. Maddy – Wizard: This one involves study and intelligence above all else. If there’s anyone more dedicated to that I don’t know them.
5. Brandon B. – Bard: He’s always trying to inspire courage and every weekend he comes back from the club with some epic tale to orate to me.
6. Heather – Evangelist: When I read this class I couldn’t think of anyone else but Heather.
7. Sarah – Crusader: When it comes to being devoted to causes, Sarah makes most people I know look lackluster. This one is all about being devoted.
8. Andrew – Ranger: Come on…we used to call the guy “The Woodsman”.
9. Greg – Master Thrower: He’s clever, but clumisness gets in the way. So might as well use that to clumsiness to throw off the enemy.
10. Me – Paladin: Everyone who I have told this joke to always says this…meh
11. Landis – Blackguard: He’s my evil opposite.
12. Crystal – Rogue: Not quite because of the finesse but because of the daringness.
13. Jo – Scout: Because Jo wouldn’t have much reason to get up close in the battles when she could use her wits and stay back to fight.
14. Brenton – Barbarian: This is just because it would be funny to see him running around in animal skins and a loincloth.

Well that’s that…this might be the nerdiest thing I have posted in a while.

Cold

Well its finally cold again, which means that the weather is suitable for doing everything I love doing outside. I’ve never been a summer person, never liked the heat and never really was excited for summer besides its obvious meaning when you’re in school.

Winter has always been more my thing.

This winter, I am hoping to get a fresh outlook and start on things.

Research

I am, in part finding the research to be more and more fun and I am spending more and more time doing it. So far it has worked out pretty well and I have learned a lot. This book: Fallen Angels: Origins of Evil has been probably of greatest help to me, but I think I will need to go and track down other texts, other books excluded from the Bible and look through them.

The things I am finding are indeed interesting and I can’t help but wonder about them in the context of religion and religious history. More over I think that many of work well as a fictional story.

I have really good ideas about the direction I want to take and I excited to do it.

New Phone

Just trying to post something here, and its going to be a picture of the new phone:

It’s the Env3.

Celebrity Mouth Pieces

According to Whoopi Goldberg and some others, its okay to fuck thirteen year old girls in every way possible so long as you make a good movie and flee capture fast enough and with the aid of your loads and loads of money.

Never mind that I had little to no respect for her already, but the fact that anyone in Hollywood or even the world thinks that what Roman Polanski did should be punished in any other way than it is with all the teachers and dating couples who are two years apart.

Hollywood in this country has gotten out of hand, they’ve been out of hand for far too long. It’s time someone reminded these fuckers that they can have causes or adopted all the little brown kids they want, but they’re not above the law.

Cheerful

Thanks for helping to cheer me up, it was hard going and I really don’t think I wanted to get cheered up in some ways. But it really helped that you were there to talk to me. Thanks Jo.

Capitalism – A Love Story

Looks like resident fat fuck—Michael Moore—has made a new movie  to capitalize on the debate of the times, like he always does. Hm, does it bother anyone else at all that he is making a movie that’s anti capitalism and charging money for it? 

And honestly, why isn’t he dead yet? The man weighs more than a Scion and I can’t understand how someone’s heart can pump through all that fat.