I feel almost obligated to write in this thing, I feel like I have something to say, some kind of sin to confess. If asked whether or not I was a really good person right now I would have to say that I’m not.
I want to be better, I want to just be able to have someone ask me “What’s wrong,” and to be able to honestly answer, “Nothing” would be good. How do you get that life that I see some other people have?
How do we really get to be happy, is it all about finding that one special person that you can spend the rest of your life with and just working on making that whole thing work? Or is it kind of like Evangelion where no matter how close you get to someone there will never be a true bond with them until we’re all dead and gone to where ever we’re going to be?
Were we engineered like this, with some kind of hole in our souls to keep us longing for a closeness that can never be achieved here in life? Is this just a test to see who gets in and who’s out?
I can’t really say much, but I think I finally understand something, there’s a reason why people call this world Hell, its so lonely here. And all I can really think now is that anything must be better than this.
It makes me wonder is it this world, or are these souls faulty.
1 comment:
Look closer, Justin. The lives you see that are perfect are often far from it. Everyone has their demons, some just hide it better than others. I know things are tough for you now, but seriously, count your blessings.
And remember, without the darkness, we could not see the light.
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