Some things just vanish before we knew they were even there, and its only in the hindsight that we see them for what they really are. Most of the time these are the most precious things, that smell that comes up from the ground right after it rains, like the world has been washed clean, that first kiss from a girl.
I found myself sitting quietly in silence a lot today, I found my mind wandering to thoughts of things that I haven’t contemplated in a while. I awoke late today, around one o’clock to find that I was still tired and that I really didn’t know what I wanted to do. It was Halloween, and well its not exactly my favorite holiday, its one of the pointless ones I don’t look forward to or dread.
I made a couple of calls, the first was to Desiree to see what she was doing, she had gone home, so I let her be and get back to whatever she was doing.
I then called Chanele and she and I talked for a few minutes as I completed a little work on GTA. She asked if I wanted to run to Wal-Mart with her and I almost jumped at the chance, I wanted this day to have some meaning and its odd, I have fun playing the game but there’s so much else I could be doing. A million things more important.
Before any of you hardcore gamers out there start to call me a sellout or a poser or even a pussy—you can because I don’t give a damn. I’m just starting to see that there are things out there that I hold very dear to me, even if its hard to admit to it, I care a lot about other things and I’m not all about games anymore.
So we went to Wal-Mart and I dropped a roll of film off and then we came back, not much else happened for a while that day, I loafed around, went and ate at the UC and then came back here to hangout with Chanele and Casey. I picked the pictures up somewhere in there.
Just about an hour back it started to rain, which is nice, and kind of bad. I had to run an umbrella over to Desi’s because she left it in my car, I don’t want her to get herself wet if this doesn’t let up.
I’m starting to long for things that I’ve always wanted to have now, and today was one of those days when it was apparent. If I was loud and talkative yesterday and Friday I’m more like me in the first year of High school right now, I’m quiet, almost deathly and I think a lot about the things around me, I comment only when I feel like there might be a laugh or something else to come of it.
And while trying to get a laugh might sound selfish its really not, people fell good when they laugh, so is it so wrong to make them?
Speaking of laughing I browsed over Maddox’s website last night, I have to say that I disagree with SO much of the things he says and stands for, but he is right about a lot too. Like the thing about Christopher Reeves not being a hero…
The man fell off a horse and broke his neck, he’s no hero, he’s at best a person who saw what it meant to be badly injured and saw the need to help other people out. But I think real Hero’s are those that chose to do what had to be done, forgetting about their own safety and well being. Reeves just didn’t do this.
On to something else, I’ve been in a halfway shitty mood lately because of things going on around me, and I’m not at liberty to say what these things entail, but they are there, I’ll just deal with it tomorrow, and we’ll go from there I guess. Here’s some pictures of friends I got back with the last roll of film…
Don't worry this isn't an activity he usually engages in
Then there's Desiree at the party Friday
Isn't she cute?
And here's Casey in her pretty new red dress
I really like that picture, it was candid!
Well I'm Off to do some other meaningless task--and so ends my post!
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