Wait and See

A lot has happened in the last few weeks, its sad how much you learn and how much things change when you have a job, when you are seperated from a lot of the things you love and when you don't have nearly as much free time. As soon as I get back to UTSA, I am done with work until I get out. Unless I can get a job I actually want, or some temporary shit. Like I would work a few nights a week, but I can't have this whole any time they call me up stuff, because they think that I don't have stuff planned on my day off.

So it just so happens that I have been doing actual art and writing recently, there have been so many ideas flooding through my head that I can't help but get them all down.

For those of you who saw the thing about the suicide earlier, my friend survived thank God, she threw all of the pills up. I was really worried because it hits home for me. It makes me think of how much some people can just not care about someone else and it makes me realize that people aren't honorable or reliable. Yesterday I wrote how I didn't believe in soulmates or whatever.

This is just one more reason not to, when you sit there and think some person was made for you, it makes you not see what else is out there. Now I don't mean always be on the look out for the bigger better thing, but if someone can't love you back, if they can't care for you or be nice to you, then kick their ass to the curb.

I love any of my friends too much to make them feel like they don't have someone who at least cares about them, everyone deserves at least friendly love, right? So now, I really am trying to get better at talking to girls, I'll have to just see how this goes.