It would seem that the healing process would be starting to affect me now, I'm turning into the same bitter person I was before, with as little regard for others as I had back then. And don't worry, I'm not selfish, I could care less about myself at the same time. I was blatantly rude to people today and it seems like with that things are getting back to normal. How come my life plays like a season of Scrubs and everything just gets really tense right there around sweeps?
It would seem that regardless of how useless, stupid, and ugly I am I do have friends. Which boggles the mind, it makes me just sit back and thing, wow, maybe I can do this. I think that the really change happened when I was sitting there the other day just staring at my computer messing with a picture and I felt like a change would be coming soon, like something big was going to happen, but for the first time in a good way. And since so much bad shit has gotten shoveled on me I would say that its about time.
Me, I'm not really a destructive person, I'm not even really all that bad, I mean while I was rude to some today I sat in the roost (which is this place where people play games) and I talked to a guy who I had previously not liked, actually two people. And before anyone says I'm a hypocrit for going in there, I have to say that I only went because class was canceled and I wanted to wait for Tarin to leave her class and I was working on a picture most of the time I was there.
I also did a kick ass picture of a friend Jen, I really think she's a cool girl, she's one of the funniest, even if I spend most time annoying her. Hmm, tonight, was long, I am tired and I had a little too much action today and not enough sleep, I leave you with this.
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