My brother opened his eyes today for the second time all of the way, that's a big improvement. Shows how much my mom knows when she talks about all of her negative stuff. Today I was emotionally drained, I don't know what it is that's taking the toll on me or even if its anyone thing.
I manage to remain my usual self in the face of, well, everything. I can't say much about, well anything. I feel like I had my energy sapped right out of me, I slept from six this evening til eight and I still feel so tired. My arms can barely move, so I guess that this is the first sign I need a break. A real one. But it won't come any time soon.
But last night I started to think, its almost July, and then comes August. In August there's that glimmer of hope. And I pray that I am not stupid for waiting on someone to return. I've fought so hard to remain who I was before she went away. And when she comes back, I wonder if she will notice a change. Thanks to her, I realized I was worth more than what I thought, and thanks to her, I was able to cut the cords from some people who would sooner hurt me than help me.
Summer is in full force but I have something to look forward to. People think of Winter as symbolizing death but I disagree, winter is my most lively time. Winter is when I am at my best. I await the new school year...the cool winds, the rain and an old friend.
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