I'm too scared that I'm going to mess up, I keep circulating the same thoughts in my head again and again and I keep coming back to the same conclusion, There is no way in Hell that things will work out in your favor. I look around and I just see how lucky some of the others are, I know that they wouldn't think it was anything special or that they had anything that great half of the time. But they do, they take it for granted.
Right now I should be sleep, sleep or drawing, instead I'm sitting here again, picking my brain. Nikki told me not to sit and dwell on it, but it calls me to, it begs me to dwell on it. And I come back to the same things, I mean why can't we just talk and explain to one another what's going on, what's the matter with it?
It's really something that I've talked about in a blog before, the whole hedgehog's delimna thing. Fear of getting too close to another for fear of getting hurt. That's how I understand it, that's what it is. Someone you are close to can do far more damage than someone not, and its not that I expect this from this person, but its also not like I haven't been unsuspecting of it before when it got thrown right in my face. What makes my hunches different this time, what makes this better?
Well I can say that I think hope makes this better, hope that I can depend on someone in this world, and hope that even if things are to continue as they are that they can continue to not be awkard at the same time. I really don't think there is much I can say. I do have to comment on some other things real quick.
Right now I am working on a few things, a comic about a little fight sequence, just something for fun. Then I am doing a picture of a friend as a Naruto character, actually I am doing a lot of my friends as Naruto people, I'll have to get back to you all at a later date about that, I am feeling sluggish and unable to write.
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