Tonight I just needed a shoulder to lie on, and I had that for a while, I needed to laugh some too, and I got that. But some things about all of this just don't add up. Why do my parents need me to call everyday, why must the baby me and treat me as if I'm seven years younger than I am?
I got really mad yesterday at a friend, and at the table in the cafe, I got mad again because people around here just don't seem to understand opinions. People here are hell bent on proving that their way is the only way, and although I am very quick to say I won't do something, I don't care whether or not someone else will most of the time.
I have been running on four hours of sleep right now, but all I can think about is how bad things seem to keep on doing. I want to just move on, I want to be normal and have a normal life. There's this girl I like right now, she's single, I don't know her very well and I just get a vibe from her that seems really good. I don't even second guess what she's thinking. Only thing is she really says that she doesn't do relationships. And I know this is kind of soon after the whole other thing, not to mention I am torn up over the stuff that just took place.
I'm really scared to form any kind of a bond with anyone right now, including this girl, and that really can't be good. I'm not sure where to take this. And I'm not sure I should take this anywhere. All I can really do is just wait on things to change. As for the depression, I don't see any end to it any time soon.
1 comment:
you're a great writer...stick with it!!! as for what you wrote...i think it is awesome that you may have found a new girl, just take it slow...you'll be able to trust girls again, and when that happens you'll be able to have that love again. kind i could be a shoulder and a laugh...anytime!!!
love ya
-h
ps: by far...you were a better shoulder than i....
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